Kick, push...coast?

So...

At first, let me assure you that I am at least breathing right now. I'm working through things as best I can. But that is not what this entry is about. This is an entry about, what else? A boy.

So I started talking to this guy. He seemed pretty cool so we exchanged phone numbers. We talked on the phone and hit it off quite well. I didn't figure it would go much further than that. I thought we might talk once or twice and that would be the end of it. I would like to say unfortunately I was wrong, but that would not be a correct statement. He called me a couple of times and each time the conversation actually stayed lively and fun. So he asks me out yesterday and I agreed.

He takes me downtown and we walk around fountain square. We grab coffee and walk around downtown for a little bit before he takes me to Mt. Adams to see the views of the city. They were really impressive, just for the record. And there was like an epically romantic moment there and it makes me smile just a little bit to think about.

Then we head back to my apartment, where he shows me some of the photographs he has taken, which were also really impressive. Then we go hang in my room for a little bit and cuddle and it was really awesome. There was no expectation for anything it was just fun hang out type of stuff. It was so refreshing to get that. I also liked that we both have the same style of humor and we laughed and played, which was super awesome.

So he calls me today and talks for a little bit. On a side note, the whole time we were hanging out I was waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak. So anyway he calls me today and we chat and then he tells me that he's not sure if he wants a relationship right now. And this is okay, because we just started hanging out, but at the same time I'm like ok...so what does this mean. Does this mean there's a possibility maybe down the line? Does this mean that he just wants to mess around? So now I have to figure out how exactly I want to go about this. I mean he really is a cool guy and there was definitely something there so I don't exactly want to just drop it like it's hot either. I don't know. I never know.